Sunday, August 28, 2011

1st Berserk Films' Staff and Cast

This year's 17th issue of Hakusensha's Young Animal magazine is announcing on Friday the main cast and staff for Berserk Ōgon Jidai-Hen I: Haō no Tamago, the first film in the three-part retelling of the Golden Age arc of Kentaro Miura's Berserk manga.

Cast:
Guts: Hiroaki Iwanaga (Tomica Hero Rescue Force, Moyashimon, Kamen Rider OOO)
Griffith: Takahiro Sakurai (Toriko, Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion, Ano Hi Mita Hana no Namae o Boku-tachi wa Mada Shiranai.)
Casca: Toa Yukinari (Grey's Anatomy dubbing, Naruto Shippūden)

Staff:
Director: Toshiyuki Kubooka (Batman: Gotham Knight episode 5)
Screenplay: Ichiro Okouchi (Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion)
Character Design/Chief Animation Director: Naoyuki Onda (Gantz)
Animation Director: Satoshi Iwataki (Toaru Majutsu no Index)
Art Director: Yusuke Takeda (Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex), Goki Nakamura (Cat Soup), others
Art Setting: Mitsuhiro Arita (Final Fantasy XI), others
World Setting Supervisor: Kenichi Iwao (Final Fantasy XI/XIV)
Western Swordsmanship Coach: Jay Noyes (Final Fantasy XII)

Berserk Ōgon Jidai-Hen I: Haō no Tamago will open in Japan in January, and the next two films will follow afterwards.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Manga Like Berserk

Being as I frequented the same forum for 5 years until it's close, I've heard this question a lot. Usually the suggestions were overruled by whatever manga was popular on the forums at the time, but I'll give a definitive answer now, with the hows and the whys, and you don't have to be bothered with the obligatory Bleach/Naruto answers.



After the break, SIX manga series you are bound to enjoy if you have found yourself enjoy Berserk so far.


Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Happy One Year Birthday, Band of the Hawk

I had almost forgotten about the birthday of my semi-beloved blog because I've been so enamored with my new E-Cigarette. But yes, today is the day of this blogs birth. I remember it as if it were yesterday. Working at a boy scout camp kitchen, where I had to sneak up to the kitchen to use their wifi at night. And one night while reading berserk and growing weary with internet forums, I decided to make this baby.

Though at times we teeter between berserk blog, anime blog and gaming blog this will always be first and foremost about Berserk.

Happy birthday darling blog. I can't promise you I'll be anymore of a serious writer or that I'll do you the justice you deserve, but you and us, we'll have some good times to come for sure.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Berserk 324 - Merrow






From where we left off last chapter, Isma flops on deck with Ishidoro, as well as a few other "merrows" (mermaids, pretty much). Isma tries to remember her true name, but the elfs warn her against speaking it. As apparently, magical creatures, or at least elves and mermaids, have true names but if they tell them to people the people will have complete control over them.


Sunday, July 24, 2011

Berserk Movie Trailer - Golden Age 1 - The Egg of the Supreme King


Bit tardy to the party on this one, but yeah. Trailer for Berserk Movie One.

Look everybody! Fully animated battle scenes, new things already being shown!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Berserk 323 - Call of the Deep



Finally, a chapter that can be considered in the "somewhat interesting" category. As you remember from 322, the Sea God burst through a mountain and is now absorbing the demons Pirates, or eating them, frankly I don't care which as long as I never seen them again.


Ao no Exorcist

Rin and Yukio
 I have been looking to find some new anime/manga to follow and I decided to give this series a try. A short description is that Rin Okumura is the the bastard son of satan, this series takes place in a world were demons exist. The demons dwell on another plane of existence called Gehenna (a.k.a Hell) and are constantly trying to come into the mortal plane. Priest or Exorcist as they are called in this series work to repel the forces of Satan, by use of swords, gun, and scriptures from different religions (mostly Christianity). At the beginning of the series he lives with his "father" Shiro Fujimoto, and his twin brother Yukio in a missionary that Shiro runs.
A series of events unfolds and causes Rin's powers awaken and the story goes from there.

Since I don't want to spoil to much ill sum it up like this. If you like demons, and the eternal struggle between good and evil, and don't mind a slightly religion spin on it you will most likely enjoy it.

If any of our readers have suggestions are decent series I could pick up that would be awesome.

Berserk Film Golden Arc to be split into THREE movies

Two movies for the Golden Arc was bad enough, but THREE. THREE MOVIES!? Really? It doesn't really need three. We've seen most of it before.

Yeah, it'll have three movies.



Muira also introduced Clara de Porras, who will kind of be the face for the movie series. I have two questions for him about that. What's with the Spanish, are you Tite Kubo now? and What the hell does she have to do with Berserk?

Friday, July 8, 2011

New Berserk Film's Title to be Berserk Ōgon Jidai-Hen I: Haō no Tamago





Yeah, the 1st Berserk film's title is Berserk Ōgon Jidai-Hen I: Haō no Tamago (Berserk Golden Age Arc I: Egg of the Supreme Ruler). I think we all knew it'd be a Golden Age movie, but I also think deep down all of us really, really wanted it to be something we haven't seen animated before.

But I SHALL TAKE WHAT I CAN GET

Berserk Ōgon Jidai-Hen I: Haō no Tamago (Berserk Golden Age Arc I: Egg of the Supreme Ruler) coming at you January 2012.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Berserk Film Release Date: "Next January"

 Apparently there's been some leakage in Japan, of the not radioactive kind (Too soon?). The July 8th announcement was indeed a release date, according to ANN anyway. The Berserk film is set to run in Japan "next January".

Now, party people. Hickshooter and myself believe this is January 2012, but the way it's worded sounds like January 2013. Am I wrong to assume "next" January means "not this one, but the next one"? I don't know, January 2012 is a much pleasanter date, so let's go with that one.

The movie will be direct by Toshiyuki Kubooka, who has little experience directing and anime aside from one episode of Batman: Goutham Knight, buuuut did do the character designs for IDOLM@STER. I sense a connection, lol. If you don't know, Kentaro Muira is rumored to love IDOLM@STER, lol.

Also, the website for the movie will be released on July 15th, so hope for an English version and not some painful to translate with a translator Flash version.

Also, also, they are releasing a new figure in honor of the movie at some point this summer.

Source for the Pic: Earlbox
(Earlbox is a not safe for work link. But fun for play and needs an english version)

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

A Naughty Review: Meet 'N Fuck: Magic Book



This a review of the latest addition by VadimGoD on Newgrounds to his Meet 'N Fuck series. Name of our new hero is Sherman Dooffy. He is a geek who spends a lot of time in the library. After being assaulted by a hot chicks boyfriend, aforementioned hot chick and geek find a magic book. In this game, you pick the right combination of words and it will transform you into something.

Now most Meet 'N Fucks I reckon were supposed to be more sexy than funny, but this one definitely has some great humor in it. And it has sexy transformations for the ladies as well as the men. The downside is, there's not a "whole lot" of sex. But it's great for laughs.

Personally, I found this to be the best one since Meet 'N Fuck Kingdom which I liked because of it's length.

Play the game in all it's glory here

I'll also add cheats:

Female Combos
Drekavae + Leeraal = Sexy Russian
Drekave + Labasu = Furry
Drekave + Jikininke = Huge Milk Tits + Action
Drekave + Pazuzu = Native American
Drekave + Sindragasum = Witch
Drekave + Haagenti = Black Angel + Action
Leeraal + Labasu = Sheeva
Leeraal + Jikininke = Chun Li
Leeraal + Pazuzu = Another Native American + Action
Leeraal + Sindragasum = Pirate
Leeraal + Haagenti = Robot
Labasu + Jikininke = Medusa
Labasu + Pazuzu = Blue Haired with weird staff and gems
Labasu + Sindragasum = Dominatrix + Action
Labasu + Haagenti = Avatar
Jinkininke + Pazuzu = Amazon Women
Jinkininke + Sindragasum = Jessica Rabbit
Jinkininke + Haagenti = Goth Girl
Pazuzu + Sindragasum = Twins +Action
Pazuzu + Haagenti = Devil Girl
Sindragasum + Haagenti = Tied Up Elf

Male Combos:

Kabhanda + Marchosias = Weightlifter
Kabhanda + Cerberus = Big Cock + Action
Kabhanda + Rahovart = Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle
Kabhanda + Furcas = Cowboy
Kabhanda + Nekomata = Sumo Wresler
Kabhanda + Incubus = Demon Apes + Action
Marchosias + Cerberus = Dracula
Marchosias + Rahovart = Mummy
Marchosias + Furcas = Gasmask
Marchosias + Nekomata = Genie
Marchosias + Incubus = Minotaur
Cerberus + Rahovart = Centuar + Action
Cerberus + Furcas = Alien
Cerberus + Nekomata = Cyclops
Cerberus + Incubus = Hellboy
Rahovart + Furcas = Alien Squid + Action
Rahovart + Nekomata = Desperado
Rahovart + Incubus = Mario
Furcas + Nekomata = Viken + Action
Furcas + Incubus = Wizard
Nekomata + Incubus = Austin Powers

Berserk 322 - A Thundering Heart


The chapter starts off with Ishidoro pulling up his man panties and finally clashing swords with the Demon Pirate Captain. He does surprisingly well, commenting that he's had lots of practice from their previous fight me. So well in fact the Pirate Captain wants him to switch sides. So he does. And Griffith shows up and destroys the fucking world.


Berserk Movie news - July 8th


Recent Tweets from the oddly quiet Berserk Movie Twitter page say that there will be news on the movie released on July the 8th. Fans speculate it will be a release date, I speculate it will be a whole SHITSTORM WORTH OF CRAP I DON'T CARE ABOUT. Like "Oh, we got Yoko Kanno to do the music instead of Susumu Hirosawa." or "Berserk project of hold for three monthes, so sorry about lack of updates"

Don't you dare make this like Duke Nukem Forever, where you put this off for TWELVE fuckin' years then push out some clunky feeling nostaligia fest tha--

I'm sorry, I got a bit off track. I've been sulking badstyle since I did not get my June release like they hinted it. But I am willing to ...wait, what with the earthquake and all. My sulking has made me a bit inactive, and normally when authors write that, it's them slowly leaving you. But I'd never do that. Many updates. Soon. Definitely a Berserk chapter update within the evening. Possibly a Duke Nukem Forever ragefest at a later date.

Picture possibly related, by the way. Looks real, but I found it at a pretty unofficial source.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Saiyans want you to stab-stab-stab your troubles away


A 38 year old named Mitsuru Imai was convicted today to a 3 year prison sentence, which is suspended for five years because he stabbed a 57 year old man with a kitchen knife. Here's the kicker, Imai claims a Saiyan from the Dragonball series, not a specific one, told him to do it.

The judge deemed that he was not quite guilty for attempted homocide, but also not guilty of temporary insanity. So, if Imai doesn't commit a crime within five years before his prison sentence, he won't got to prison. This lax sentence kind of makes me want to commit crimes in Japan, seriously.

I, however, see flaws in his story. Saiyans don't normally use weapons to attempt to kill people. They fight, with their fists, like real men! So in theory, he would tell the man to beat his victims not stab them. Imai, there are holes here.

Monday, May 16, 2011

I'd read it: Barcode Geass: Lelouch of the Sales

I was "meh" about the whole Code Geass series, though I did watch all of it. But today they are launching a little 4 Koma reimagining in Japan--Barcode Geass: Lelouch of the Sales. As a poor son of a bitch whose worked time in sales, I'd read the shit out of this. It's pretty much Lelouch working part time in a convenience store. I do wonder if he gets a Geass power that scans barcodes and such, lol.

Which working in any store would be handy. Given what Code Geass was about, I figure that this has the potential to be a really interesting story. Now i any translators are reading this, make go with the translations!

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Berserk 321 - The Sea God (3)



The chapter starts off in a little more badass manner than usual with the barrier holding against the spawn of the Sea God, however, the pirates just come busting through it since it's effectiveness is pnly half against real people. But how how pirates that have been merged to their ship are real people, I don't know. The real badass part is when the Captain Pirate and Ishidoro get into a screaming match and Ishidoro leads the charge in.

We then change back to Gutts who is trying, and failing, to kill the trilobytes trying to escape the stomach acid. They become so heavy that they bring the mast down and Gutts gambles on the fact that he can cut open the stomach. His gamble was correct and they get "burped" into another part of the body.



The Sea God has a serious demon tapeworm problem though. He provides them with nourishment, they defend his insides. Gutts and shierke press onwards saying that they will have to fight through many of those nests and that is the last we see of them for the chapter.



Back outside, the crew is attempting to hold the pirates charge back, in which Serpico helps blow them back with his wind and the "Great Mustachiod Horseman" (Yeah, lol) cuts them down. The chapter ends with Ishidoro and the Pirate Captain clashing swords.

They next chapter may actually be an Ishidoro fight. :D As Gutts' apprentice, he really needs to do something badass to save face.For the first time since this Sea God crap started, I'm actually looking forward to the next chapter. Too bad Miura is a total cockblock and isn't releasing it till June 24th. But if I understand correctly, it'll return to bi-weekly after that.

Download it here!

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Omnipotent Body Shuttering Gasm: Madoka Magica



My previous post about my thoughts on Madoka Magica, thoroughly unspoiled by spoilers and general ignorance based based on my taste in anime can now be clarified as I have now finished the series. Open to close. There's a reason the title is as it is, it is how I explained how I felt about the ending to my Co-Author Hickshooter after he had several turns of "Guess the gasm that show just gave me." (Game spawned from the term Angst-gasm, which is how we refer to the ending of the Berserk Anime).

There are few words, the comments from before told me shit gets real after episode three. Which was mostly true aside from a few major tripfests with the artwork in the beginning. The series progressively turned towards despair, but I've seen my fair share of sad things in anime. I didn't become truly affected until the tenth episode. Basically, when some shit got explained.

Madoka Magica is a solid lesson to me that I shouldn't judge anime by it's cover, I've been trying, but Lord do they make it hard sometimes with lolita outfits and varying hair colors.

I'm not known for being into decoding deep symbolism in anime, but I believe if you are into that, there is enough in Madoka to keep you entertained and thinking for several watches over. Not just in the dialogue, but in the artwork as well. The meaning in the dialogue is pretty straight forward, as dialogue usually is, but I do believe that there is some meaning hidden deep within the art of the witches.

Critical thinking material aside, the music was set on God mode pretty much the entire time. I won't lie, I'm in love with the violin and was happy to hear some old classics thrown in there.

For fun, I'm going to sum this up with my review system I use for reviewing things.

-5 Pink and blue hair colors.
-5 Lolita dress
-5 Transforming from normal to magical girl mode was generic as shiiiit
-1 I CAN'T THINK OF ANY MORE NEGATIVES, WTF.

+5 Girls were the age they looked
+5 Witches trip my face off
+1 I wish I could curtsy and rifles fell from my dress
+5 Stopping time to steal weapons, lawl
+20 I had to collect my brain after episode 12
+10 Music was inspiring.

-16/+46 I say I liked it, a lot. I hope to see more like it. Not necessarily Magical Girls, but super awesome angsty deep anime.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Puella Magi Madoka Magica - What is this strange fandom?



For the past two monthes, on every blog I follow, on every news source, all I've seen is people shitting themselves over this Puella Magi Madoka Magica show. On the outside I look at it and see a show I clearly don't want to watch. What with all the bright colors and child-like women. However, soon I am going to delve deep down into the series and watch the shit out of it to see why there is such a fuss.

I don't exactly follow the new anime seasons but when there is something that carries a strange cult following of fans that will gladly die for it, I feel the need to watch. Lucky Star I found interesting because of the unique art and it's otaku nature. Haruhi had a strange interesting flair all it's own. Perhaps I will be surprised by this anime too and brand it's name to my chest.

But UGH, magical girls.

Can my readers provide insight on why this anime is alpha as fuck, or do I just have to go find out?

Berserk 320 - Sea God (2)



The chapter starts where we left off in 319 with Gutts making a mad dash into the Sea God's belly. As he enters, the Demon Pirates decide that they are going to go fuck up The Sea Horse (Gutts' ship) and set sail with the whole demon armada. This chapter actually becomes interesting in the way that we see something that has not yet happened to Gutts. Him letting down his GAR face and kicking back with a donut and a coffee? No, him being INSIDE a demon to chop it up.



Thankfully, Shierke talks him out of just chopping away at his stomach, which by the way is filled with ships. So he decides to go right for the heart. However, cutting through the stomach or climbing to the ceiling would take far too long. Conveniently though,  there's a bit of stomach acid coming up on him to set the ships afloat towards the ceiling where the heart is behind. The Sea God also has a serious trilobite problem in his tummy as they also appear to be trying to escape being digested.



Back at the Sea Horse, they prepare for battle with the guys from Pirates of the Caribbean and fire their cannons on them. And it ends. I kind of wonder where this whole chapter is going. Is Gutts gonna get to the heart and just...slash at it? More probably, it's going to be some separate sentient being or some shit. Also, I call it now. Something happens to Shierkes' body and she gets pulled back and Gutts transforms.

Next chapter is May 13th though. I love these not three month breaks.

Download Berserk 320 here.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

New Rurouni Kenshin Anime Green-lit






Anime News Network recently announced that there is a new Rurouni Kenshi in the mix. After one long ass anime series, 3 OVAs, a movie, and a manga series that ended 12 years ago I'm not exactly sure what there is to expand upon.

If you have seen Samurai X: Reflection then you know that the saga of Himura Kenshin has a definite ended; however the creator does not agree with it as canon, so will this new Kenshin anime be a canon ending to the series or just another money maker off of a series that is already dubbed a classic in the anime world?

I think it would be interesting to see a rehash of the series without the filler, like FullMetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, plus seeing the series with an animation update would be amazing. If it's an anime about Himura Kenji, I may punch someone.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

TokyoPop's death and you!

TokyoPop recently announced that it will be closing it's last North American office. If you're awesome and don't live in North America, then this means nothing for you. You're good, bros. If you do live in North America, then you better hop your favorite series is carried by Viz or Dark Horse, because Tokyopop is unsure what will happen to it's English releases over here. Apparently, the bankruptcy of the bookstore Borders really hit them hard, as I would have assumed since they were my main stop for buying manga.

So unless someone else aquires the rights for Tokyopops' foreign offices continue to distribute over here, we will be without:

-Warcraft/Starcraft manga (But why...)
-Fruits Baskets
-Great Teach Onizuka (D:)
-Gravitation
-Togainu No Chi
-Tramps Like Us
-FAKE
-BECK

And many, many more.

If these series are no long distributed here, this will be a huuuuuge hit to a lot of series. Let us hope that they continue to give us manga. Especialy GTO, because that shit was GREAT.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Berserk 319 - The Sea God (1)



The long awaited chapter starts with Gutts with astral Shierke on his back hopping into the cave in a very Naruto-esque ninja way, where Shierke brings up that the cave has massive spiritual pressure within it. Lolpleasedontbelikebleach. As they get in further they find those god damned annoying as shit pirates again inside, who goes on and on for pages about how he can be no mere human to get this far but he's going to die anyway as an army of those...sea slug things crawl from the water. Blah de blah.



Behind the pirates, the Sea God appears who is basically a large set of jaws teeth with a tentacle beard. Regrettably, the sea god doesn't eat the pirates just harble garbles in the back. The sea god is indeed so massive in size that the tentacles they fought on the island was just a portion of his tentacle beard getting loose. Yo sea god so fat his BMI is measured in acres. Yo sea god so fat when his beeper goes off, people thought he was backing up. Yo sea god so...Okay, I'm done.



Yo sea god fat jokes aside, Shierke recommends they back up into a narrower part of the tunnel so they don't have to fight everything at once, Gutts disagrees as this would also hinder his massive sword. So in a very Gutts-like way of thinking he decides the best course of action was to go straight into the sea god's mouth and eat it's insides. Thankfully, he at least uses the annoying pirates face as a stepping stone.

Kind of boring chapter, and short to boot. A tiny fifteen pages of nothing that seems at all interesting. The sea god's design has to be one of the most...uncreative things I've ever seen. I'm pretty sure I drew a picture of the sea god when I was five. Bunch of teeth, some squigglies on the chin, you know, all that. The best part of the chapter, he left a date for the next one.

Berserk 320 - April 22nd. The best day before my birthday present I could ever get.

Download Berserk 319 here.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Band of the Hawk: Now with manga downloads



I have a mostly finished Berserk Manga Downloads page up there, so if you fancy reading some...There they are. I have to add volume 35 and those other random unvolumed chapters which I will do when I've slept a bit. Enjoy. Please contact me if the links don't work.

Speaking of contact with the unknown, the About page has also been slightly updated. So swing on by there.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

I now dedicate my life to making Berserk-themed cocktails.



If there is one thing I advocate more than porn, it's drinking. I have now realized my life's mission. To make Berserk themed cocktails for several of major characters of Berserk. Now being as my 21st birthday is still 22 days (April 23rd) away, the project will have to be postponed till then, but hey! I can still think up ideas. Your input for ideas is welcomed, but I'll just go through a rough list of what I have planned.

A Gutts cocktail: A must. I have a giant wall scroll of his face on my wall, I must create one of the most fierce cocktails known to man. The idea of it screams just pouring a bunch of strong liqour in a glass, but I want this to be powerful yet palatable. Most likely Everclear based with something to try to mask the sheer fire of drinking Everclear.


A Judeau cocktail: I want something that says something about his personality. Stealthy, loyal, kind. Would it be an insult to him if I made it a girly drink?

A Caska cocktail: Dark liqour like her skin, sweeter tasting and not something that will be masked fire like the Gutts cocktail may end up like. Or I could make it so strong you felt like you got raped by demons and lost your memory. <____<

A Griffith cocktail: I must secure a way to make liqour look milky. Then I must make it a semi-homosexual girly drink. With maybe some amaretto at the bottom for blood/darkness.

Band of the Hawk cocktail: Take previous cocktails and mix? Lol. Honestly, I've got nothing for this, but I will figure something out after a browse through the liqour store.

A Zodd cocktail: MUST. MAKE. RED. LIKE. BLOOD. That's all I've got.

A Skull Knight cocktail: This cocktail must be awesome and I need to put more thought in it. Suggestions welcome.

A Void cocktail: I hate to say it, but I may use Jager in this one. Too bad, I dislike Jager. Or maybe make a cement mixer, lol. (A cement mixer is Irish Cream and Lemon Juice. It makes the drink look and feel like a brain in your mouth.

The Brand of Sacrifice cocktail: Give up those you love, and I will make you very...drunk.

As I stated before, suggestions are very much welcomed and credit will be do if you inspire me. I am pretty excited for this mission, and I have some good visual ideas in my head. I also look forward to extensive testing. However, I think my liver and stomach do not. I do make this pledge to you though readers, I will not serve you a recipe for a drink that tastes like shit. I cannot guarantee that it won't make you sick in the morning with much certainty though, I have a bit of a weak stomach.

Keep tabs on the blog in May, or late April for these updates.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Miura confirms Berserk manga to end December 2012


Oh shit. Young Animal, long time publisher on Miura's works made the announcement today that his manga Berserk, the heart and soul of this blog, will come to and end next year. Miura says he has not been taking time off to play Idol M@ster like every one thinks, but to write up a now completed transcript of how Berserk will end.

Consequently, the end date also lines up with the end of the world.

Happy April Fools Day, everyone!

20 Reasons why Nabari No Ou is better than Naruto

There are many similarities between Nabari No Ou and Naruto, but I am a firm believer in the opinion that it is better.

1. Ninjas don't wear orange. A classic argument.

2. These ninjas have to get up every day and go to white collar jobs like the rest of us poor sons of bitches. There is a clear differentiation from the modern world and the ninja world.

3. Being as there is only one season, there are no seasons of filler. In fact, every episode has a point of moving the main storyline along.

4. It uses the historical descendants of famous ninja. Fuuma, Hattori, Iga, Koga, ect. History, for the win.

5. Ninjas that can turn into giant animals, fuck yeah!

6. Shinobi weapons are used for killing and not a distraction. In Naruto, throwing a shuriken at someone is akin to throwing a crumpled piece of paper at them.

7. There are no episodes specifically for powering up. You have to admit Naruto has fallen into the DBZ factor at times.

8. The plot isn't as slow moving as industrial sludge.

9. Nobody spends anytime admiring how powerful someone is. I think the phrases "what power!" and " I can't believe how powerful he has become." will be responsible for cancer forming in the portion of the brain used for cognitive faculties.

10. Minimal running through badly looped tree backgrounds. There is some, but only for a few seconds at most. They never have intense conversations while hopping through the trees.

11. Superior artwork and Animation. Naruto got better with Shippuden, but the art and animation still makes you wonder if they let a five year old take over while they got donuts sometimes.

12. The sides in which are good and evil become slowly more vague as you get into the plot, it's pretty surprising.

13. Sooooo many plot twists.

14. Less Ninjutsu/demons, more Taijutsu. Rock Lee should request a transfer to the Nabari-verse. Amirite?

15. If you're a mediocre ninja left to guard a scroll of secret techniques, bullets will kill you.

16. Characters don't have their motives on their sleeves. Everyone has an agenda, and I do mean everyone. I think Miharu's cat had a god damn agenda.

17. The women, while scare, weren't useless and ineffectual.

18. Techniques that drain your life, literally drain your life. You get to experience Yoite's five senses failing as he continues to use his Kira. Apparently in Naruto you'll just randomly drop dead one day, not slowly drop dead.

19. The main character, while a little gay, isn't an annoying asshat who desires power.

And finally,

20. It has an ending. Ooooh, sick burn.

All that being said, Basilisk > Nabari No Ou > Naruto. I did Nabari No Ou because I feel significantly less people have watched it.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Games to Anime: Xenosaga


I've been on a bit of a bender lately with nostalgia, and one of the biggest fandoms of my younger days was the Xenosaga series on the PS2. I remember once I sat down to play and spent 45 minutes on a cut-scene alone. Nobody would be lying if they said Xenosaga was more a movie than a game. So consequently, it got an anime. An awesome anime at that.

It doesn't follow the games storyline (in which it's based on only the first game)
to the letter, but it actually comes surprisingly close. I'm glad they didn't go off on some alternate universe tangent just because they couldn't include all three games. Some characters appear a little more than they did in the first game, like Jin and Louis Virgil, but do nothing to particularly divert from the storyline. Though Jin's involvement to the story is never explained and I'm not sure why they saw it prudent to even include him when he's more of a major character in the second game.

I found one thing about the anime that I noticed as being unusual is a technique they did with the voice acting. If you were close up to a character, they sounded normal, but the camera was farther away, they had an echo and were quieter. Since almost all of Xenosaga takes place on a ship, I found this to be an innovative technique that I really enjoyed even if I had to adjust the volume at times.

It's not exactly hard to trump a PS2's graphics or copy characters that look like they belong in an anime to an anime, but the artists did a really nice job.

Watching it made my nostalgia alarm go off so hardcore I wanted to bust out my PS2 and play it. I would have too, if my disc weren't scratched to hell. The animation was nice and crisp, very clean with not a lot of fluff put into it.

I would like to see them do the second and third game since they left it a bit open, but things get even more confusing in those games. I wonder if people who have never played the game would be left confused by all the acronyms and terms you have to get familiar with. I meant to test it on Hickshooter, but he only joined me in watching at the last four episodes. If anyone has watched it, but not played the game I would appreciate your insight.

Monday, March 28, 2011

New Berserk chapter April 8th?


The Berserk Anime Projects Twitter roughly thinks so. We will see. I thought it would have been a little longer of a wait, but April 8th sounds good to me. Give me something to talk about other than porn and games.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Japan wants your genkidama for their spirit bomb


Alright, not so much for a spirit bomb persay. Just for Quake Tsunami Combo Breaker relief. The video at the end of this post will generate money for the victims and the relief fund for every time it is watched, apparently. It's 35 seconds so...Get on that shit. Many times, lol. It can't hurt, anyway. It's a nice way to help if you're poor as balls.


Monday, March 21, 2011

I think we can admit the Japanese people are the better people.

I haven't really talked about the Japanese 2011 Quake Tsunami combo breaker other than letting you all know that Miura was still alive. That doesn't mean that I haven't been keeping tabs on it. The morning I heard about it I watched CNN literally all day.

And the next day.

Those people, I just want to say are taking this like champs. Hickshooter concurs. When disaster strikes in the United States, we loot, we push, shove, and are generally unruly. I think we've all seen examples of that. The images on the news are of Japanese people calmly waiting in lines, claiming they have it bad but not complaining because others have it worse. Helping each other.

Their criminals even have more class than us. You know why there is no looting right now? Because yakuza are helping the police force patrol the street. To me, that is...utterly amazing. It makes me proud of humanity when I hear things like that.

That's all, I just wanted to throw that out there.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Kentarou Miura confirmed alive after 2011 Quake

Yeah, Berserk's author is thankfully alive and kicking, though finding out such was delayed because he has some sort of vendetta against social networking. Not that I blame him, every man has his morals. Anyway, no one stateside is quite sure where he is hanging out, all we have to go on is the picture below encouraging Japan to help each other.


Just thought you all would like to know. But I'm pretty sure there will be an even longer delay on Berserk chapters giving us a longer time to talk about nothing.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

I give thee: Berserk Abridged by HBI2K in download form.



Since there has literally been nothing new happening with Berserk, no new anime twitter announcements that aren't in broken English and annoying, no new manga chapters, no new...anything. I figured I'd would put up something that's Berserk related, and awesome.

If you've ever watched an Anime Abridged series that was any sort of good, you'll...well...know what an Abridged Series is. For those of you that have no idea what an abridged series is, it's where the creator takes scenes from the show and does a new voice over to create a funnier version of the story. HBI2K and the rest of his consortium do some seriously great quality work. Berserk has one, I wonder if you knew that? Mr. Smarty McSmartpants. It's getting a bit on in years and due to Youtube's whole copyright infringement thing has grown rather hard to find.

But at the end of this post, I bring you from my computer to yours, the complete Berserk Abridged series by HBI2K in full.

Yes. I liked it so much I individually downloaded each episode and have had them on my PC for some time. I've watched it so much I use quotes from it without realizing it in my daily life. Because I am a very strange person. I have watched it so much, I leave the episodes on loop while I am grinding on WoW.

I recommend it.

Oh, you're download. Berserk Abridged. If the link goes down, comment and I will fix it all up.
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=3JSUX6A4

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Anime Moments That Make Me Go "What the Fuck?"

The obligatory scene to start off all slice of life/school themed anime where the main character and/or their future love interest is running late to class. What the fuck, you'd think they would find a better way to start a story or introduce characters into it.


The obligatory Shounen anime power up that the main character gets when he's losing. What the fuck, Bleach. Stop trying to be DBZ.

Anime characters never get hair cuts. What the fuck, mine gets annoying as hell when do you find the time to brush that waist long shit.

If cold air blew on an anime character, they'd catch a cold. And they would faint. What the fuck, my sister broke pretty much every bone on her left side and held consciousness, you can't handle some sniffles?

Recap episodes. What the fuck, I watched the whole series already and no I don't care about someone elses perspective on it.



Excel Saga, what the fuck is going on?



Every girl in a shounen series falling for the main character. What the fuck, he got a power-up but my sword is still bigger D:

When people tell me to stop watching crappy anime and I won't get what the fuck moments. What the fuck, you're suggestions were all mainstream anime I have seen already.

The moment in a romance anime where they see their love interest with a member of the opposite sex. What the fuck, I can't have gender different friends? My trannie friend would hate you.



Shinji blowing his load on a comatose Asuka in Evangelion. What the fuck, kid?

You'd be surprised at the amount of people that google tentacle rape. PART 2


I strongly dislike when I put on my school girl skirt and Cthulhu sports a chub. Anyway, way back when I wrote an article about how many people google tentacle rape. Well, you know what has happened? It's now my top viewed article.

OF ALL THE THINGS.

ON THE INTERNET.

TENACLES?

My words can only be expressed in short capitalized statements that don't make much sense. Now let's try a little experiment. If this becomes my second most viewed, or lawl first most. I will find a tentacle rape H-game and post it for you.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

New Berserk Anime Movie to come out in January


NewType Japan (since I don't think NewType US even exists anymore) ran an article about the New Berserk Movie Saga, which is where I fetched the above picture as well. 
Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a tentative release date.

June 2011. Be there or be circle.

Update: It's January 2012. Be there or be ...a whore?

If anime characters ran a university...


I would go to it.
On a separate note, you may have had to browse 4chan to get some of these. Because it was made by 4chan. But it's still pretty awesome.

Friday, January 28, 2011

Shout Out to the Best: Meet N' Fuck Games by VadimGoD


Now, Newgrounds isn't exactly the Mecca of hentai, but hentai sites do put samples up on there. That I absolutely love. There's member there called VadimGoD who's work I've followed for a long time. My favorite of these works is the Meet N' Fuck Series. I am unsure if these came from the website or if he made them then made a website, whatever it is. I love them.

They make Eroge fun and of course hot. Something a lot of professional Eroge is not, it's a lot of clicking through talking to get to the good stuff. This sets you up so you can pick your dialogue options and the sex scenes are actually quite interactive. Eroge pro's, take note of that. I love dating sims and I love eroge, combining them makes me wet.

New Berserk anime to be in...Movie format?


EHHH? Movie format? This translation was posted on the New Berserk Anime Project's Twitter on January 8th

[Diffusion Hope] Berserk 2011 will be a movie version anime !! The whole story of Berserk will be adapted !! Epic Berserk saga project; start. Furthermore, the movie release is aimed at half of 2011!! This is an official announcement !! 

So...Movies. On the bright side, movies come out faster than series. And they did say the whole series will be covered. But when they say the whole SERIES do they mean the whole ANIME series or the whole MANGA series. Even if movies do come out fast, Berserk related things have never had the reputation of being fast.